Month: July 2020

Never doubt God’s timing for events in your life. Your days are ordered by Him. Psalm 139:16 paraphrased

What did 1972 look like in America? It was the year that The Godfather movie was released, Nixon was president, the Watergate Scandal began, the War in Vietnam continued, Jane Fonda visited North Vietnam, Bobby Fischer became the first American chess champion, The Price is Right game show debuted on TV, the stock market broke 1000 points, and we got married.

It’s interesting to compare us with couples of today who seem to have lucrative jobs when they marry, have a financial plan, know where they want to be in ten years, and have a road map for their life. We began marriage with a red VW, an awful upstairs apartment, seminary and a construction job for Randy, and a teaching job for me. Other than that, we had no job description for what we would be required to do during our marriage for the ministry or for life in general.

Every marriage starts out with the hope to be “perfect”, and I must confess that I was certain ours would be! Now I know that there is really no such thing as the perfect marriage, couple or person. The visions of bliss can turn swiftly into reality, and it takes true love and commitment to see it through.

Looking back, it’s easy to see that there are stages of marriage just like stages of development, grief, or growth. Randy likes to say that marriage went from romance to reality when I insisted that he carry me up the 20 steep steps to our apartment upon the return from our honeymoon. It’s tradition – deal with it!

Romance may bring two people together, but unselfish love keeps them together. Each person has to be willing to be a giver rather than a taker in order to make the marriage work. It takes a lot of teamwork to succeed, just like the empty container – you put nothing in, you get nothing out.

The first year of our marriage was spent with school work, adjustment to married life, and typing papers into the wee hours of the morning. I typed while Randy dictated his thoughts because apparently he failed typing 101 and remedial typing. I remember thinking many times, “I didn’t sign up for this”, but actually I did. I began to realize what “for better or worse” really means.

We were ill prepared for the duties of a minister and spouse, but God has a way of throwing you right in and making decisions that help you learn, mature and grow.

After graduation from seminary, Randy served two years as an associate pastor in Dalton, Ga., and I taught. Before I knew it, the District Superintendent came calling, and he sent us to our first church, a circuit near Covington Georgia and left us with these words; “Love these folks, minister to them, grow these churches and spread the word of God.” I’m afraid I had no idea what was wrapped up in those few words. I love to say, “If I had known then, what I know now,” but that’s not really true, I would change nothing!

Some people think that a minister’s job is easy – after all, he just works one day a week (I wish I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that). I would have probably agreed forty eight years ago. The truth is, Sunday is the easy part, it’s the day to day ministry that makes you strong and humble in what you do. God took us and placed us in every new situation to teach us exactly what He needed and use that to help others.

In Newborn, we had a darling older lady by the name of Eleanor. She lived alone, but she had neighbors close to check on her. One night around three in the morning, the parsonage phone rang, I answered, and she asked me to send Randy over quickly. Thinking she was sick or dying, he got up, threw on clothes and went over. When he returned, he was smiling. I asked what happened, and he said, “Miss Eleanor fell out of bed and she couldn’t get up. I picked her up and put her back in bed. When I asked why she didn’t call a neighbor she said, ‘Oh, Randy, I have my nightgown on – I can’t let a man see me in my nightgown’.” These kinds of events that we share, made a marriage and a ministry stronger. You just can’t make these stories up!

I sometimes used to wonder if God had given us a job description what would it have been? Now, I know. It would have been the words that were written above Randy’s desk for all his years in the ministry, “Not Me, But Thee.” Have we always done a good job of keeping those words? No. Have we always tried to follow God’s lead? Yes, I hope so. Did we make mistakes? Yes. Do we have occasion for regrets? Yes. Have we received more than our share of love, mercy and grace? Absolutely. Are we grateful every day? Yes indeed.

I now live by a story told by a married lady who recalls thinking she should make a list when she married of ten faults she would overlook in her husband for the sake of their marriage. She never got around to making that list. Each time he would do something she didn’t like, she’d say to herself, “Lucky for him that’s one of the ten”.

The day of our wedding, Reverend Henry Erwin said these words, “I know you think you are in love today as you stand before the altar, but in years to come, you will shudder to think how shallow your love was on this day. As the years pass, love only grows deeper.” After 48 years, I must agree. A huge thank you to all of the people that have enriched our lives and taught us about love and commitment over these years! Happy Anniversary, Randy!

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence; so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16

My high school English teacher was a very proper lady who strictly abided by the laws of grammar, sentence structure, and pronunciation. We called her “Miss Ann”. Two of her pet peeves were the pronunciation of the word just and the word get. I can still hear her saying, “The word is Just, not jest; and the word is Get, not git.”

Randy and I, both being from the Southern parts of the country, are gifted with the southern dialect and accent; however, because of Miss Ann, I learned correct pronunciations!! Randy must not have had the same instruction! During Randy’s sermons if the words Just or Get came out of his mouth, and they came out as jest and git, (as they sometimes did) the hair on the back of my neck would stand straight up! Even though I was dealing with pronunciation, the bigger picture here is how we can use the word just totally out of context and use it to limit God.

The word Just can be used as an adjective or an adverb. If it’s used as an adjective, it means “based on or behaving according to what is morally right and fair”. For example, that law is just. If it’s used as an adverb it means, “exactly” or “very recently.” For example, I just got home.

Lately, the word just has taken up residence in many prayers that are offered to God. Some people begin their prayers with, “We just come to you today, Lord, or We just pray that You would…” Those are called Just prayers, and they unknowingly limit God. What exactly does it mean? Does it mean we just thought of You, God, or does it mean that we hope because of this prayer that You’ll be just to us? Maybe its just a way to add drama to a prayer or put it into more common language. No matter the reason, it demonstrates a lack of faith and confidence in approaching the throne of God even though it’s meant to sound humble.

We should all have confidence in knowing that if we ask anything in His name and abide in His will, He hears us. If we know that He hears us, then, we should know that all we have asked is being done. He doesn’t need to be limited.

I think using the word just in a different way would apply to these times. When I was growing up, and we sat around our table for supper, Mama would say, “Did you get enough? Daddy would usually reply, “Just enough.” It means sufficient or exactly. I like that for us today. God gives us just enough love, just enough joy, just enough power, and just enough hope to sustain us. If we believe it, then, He will take if from there and give us just enough mercy, just enough grace, and just enough love.

The beautiful anthem, In This Very Room says it best, and if we substitute the word just for the word ‘quite’ in the song, I think it shows us the perfect way to use that word. Think of the room as your heart, your home, your church, your life, or your world. The lyrics (after taking license to change one word) are: In this very room, there’s just enough love for all of us; In this very room, there’s just enough joy for all of us; And there’s just enough hope, and just enough power to take away any gloom; for Jesus, Lord Jesus, is in this very room. Ron and Carol Harris

Jesus is in this very world, and He offers us just enough.

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouth, but only as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. Ephesians 4:29

You’ve got to accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative; latch on to the affirmative and don’t mess with Mister In Between. Johnny Mercer

The song above was first released in 1944 and debuted in a movie Here Come the Waves which was a recruitment film during the war. My Mama used to love to sing it because it has a strong message. The song was written in the style of a sermon which explains that accentuating the positive is the key to happiness.

Remembering that song has helped me realize that even though there’s always something negative, the positive should be the side that’s accentuated.

In the midst of all the bad news out there, I have a facebook friend who always errs on the side of the positive. Instead of listing how many people have died from the virus, how many new cases per day, how many people are in the hospital, she posts the encouraging number of how many people have survived. She accentuates the positive.

I ran into another old friend yesterday, and when I asked her how she was, she replied, “I’m not just surviving, I’m thriving!” She is taking the high road and accentuating the positive. I love those positive thoughts!

I seem to be in line at Starbucks some afternoons about the time when everyone else is in line, but during these days, I don’t mind the wait. On this particular day, when I pulled up to the window to pay, the server said, with a huge smile, “Guess what? Your coffee is free?” When I said, “What? Why?” He replied, “That car of crazy teenagers in front of you paid for it!” What an accentuation of the positive they gave me that day!! Thank you!

It’s so easy in today’s world to put all the attention on the negative things which are plaguing our society, but negative thinking isn’t helping anyone. In some cases, the negativity leads to depression and the mindset of unhappiness. It’s impossible really to completely eliminate negativity because it’s human nature to use the negative as a method to warn us of danger, but there are things to remember.

The best way to accentuate the positive is to only speak uplifting and good things about others. Speak things which build up others. Spend time with positive people doing positive, thoughtful things. When people began to speak negatively, try to interject something good that’s going on – we can always find a bright spot.

I find that when I let the news start my day, the entire day has a negative slant. There are more and more people who are just turning off the TV or radio, putting down the I pad, computer or social media, and pulling out the Bible or a devotional to start the day. I’m here to attest to the power it can have to accentuate the positive every morning!

Finally, give thanks to God every day for all the positive blessings in your life. No matter where you look, there’s always someone who has more problems, more pain, more suffering than you. Be grateful for what you have! Remember, this will all pass one day, and we will be glad we accentuated the positive.

Everything comes to pass, nothing comes to stay. copied

Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. James 5:13

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times; it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness; it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity; it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness; it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair; we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to heaven, we were all going direct the other way. Charles Dickens,  A Tale of Two Cities       

In this epic novel, Charles Dickens seems to point out a major conflict between family and love, hatred and oppression, good and evil, light and darkness and wisdom and folly.  It tells about a time of chaos, conflicts and despair as well as happiness. It tells about a time of direct opposites with no in between.

In the last months, it seems we have experienced the worst of times and tried to salvage the best from them.  We are dealing with a virus that has literally brought the world we know to a screeching halt.  We’ve seen job loss, economy weakened, death, separation from loved ones, church closures, sequestered folks, and the emotional stress which comes with it all.  Yet, we are  a strong people and are fighting our way back.  There will come a time when we will look back on this and find the best of times in the experience.

During my growing up years, our granddaddy owned a small house on Mexico Beach, Fla.  The house was two bedrooms, two baths, a loft, a kitchen, living room and screened in porch.  There was no air conditioning, no television, only three beds, one store and you had to walk a couple of blocks to the beach.  The kids slept on cots, the adults too if they lost out on the beds, and sometimes we complained that there was nothing to do.  

Regularly, we had over 25 people in that house with cousins, friends, and others.  The adults played bridge on the screen porch until the wee hours of the morning, and if you were lucky and the laughter had kept you awake, one of them might come in and grab you to take their place at the bridge table so they could go to bed.  No sleep, days in the ocean and the sun, nights of campfires and wiener roasts, s’mores, jeep rides, and so much more!  Yet, sometimes we felt it was the worst of times because we didn’t understand how lucky we were.

No matter how bad our times seem, there are always those who have it worse.  We just found out that in Honduras the folks only get to shop for groceries and water every 14 days.  There is not “curbside service”, or “take out” for them – they must live for two weeks on what they have.  If you haven’t had the virus or lost a loved one, if you have freedom, if you have  friends and family, then you are living in the best of times.  We can sometimes think we are in the worst of times because we don’t know how lucky we are. 

Many say the closings, the sequestering, the social distancing are God’s way of getting our attention and letting us know we should slow down.  Maybe, but maybe it’s the evil one at work to separate us.  What is our world without the fellowship and kinship of human interaction?  The kids and youth are desperate for school to start again because they miss their friends and teachers.  Most people I know are desperate to return to worshiping with their church family.  The many I know in nursing homes are desperate to see loved ones again.  The sick are desperate to get well.  Those who have lost a loved one are desperate to have some kind of closure.  

If you think you are in the worst of times, look back to World War I and World War II, and try to picture rationing of sugar and other items.  My parents lived through that. When the only thing you lack is toilet paper and clorox, it seems you really might be living in the best of times comparatively speaking of course.

In the above verse, Jesus seems to be calling those of us who think we are in the worst of times to pray and ask God to defeat the forces of evil which could be among us.  He also says that if we feeling blessed or cheerful, we should pray and give thanks.

In this best of times, worst of times, we need to remember that with God we always have reasons to give thanks and praise.  We need to remember how lucky we are!!  God bless us everyone!